Let me skip the part where I tell you nursing is a calling and I’ve always known I was meant to help people. You’ve heard that. You’ve probably said it yourself. And you know as well as I do that it doesn’t quite cover what it actually feels like to be fifteen years in and still showing up.
Here’s the real version.
My name is Nicole. I started as a CNA in 2010, worked my way through the ranks, and I’m currently a Director of Nursing in long-term care. Which means I manage a full team, deal with staffing nightmares, call-outs, and the particular joy of being held responsible for everything while being blamed for anything.
About halfway through my career I hit a wall. Real burnout — the kind where you’re driving to work and genuinely wondering what it would feel like to just not. I grew up professionally in a culture built on perfectionism and shame, led by the kind of nurses who wore their hardness like a badge. The ones who thought suffering quietly was just part of the deal.
I chose to stay. But I chose to stay differently.
This is not a place where I tell you to download a meditation app. This is where we talk honestly about what it’s actually like to lead in nursing — the burnout, the impossible expectations, the moments you’re holding everyone else together while quietly falling apart yourself.
I’ve found ways to make it work. Not every day. Not perfectly. But enough to still be here, still leading, and occasionally even liking it.
If that sounds like something you need — you’re in the right place.